The Art of Entertaining
Playing the part of host or hostess can be one of life’s great joys. Whether you are honoring your own life milestones or else cheering on those of your nearest and dearest, being the catalyst for celebration and the glue that binds it together as drinks and conversations flow is reason for a toast in and of itself. However, though we are all familiar with the pretty phrase “the art of entertaining”, the fact of the matter is that hosting sometimes more closely mimics a stressful science than a delicate craft.
Whether you are an experienced party thrower or a first time dinner party host-to-be who is wondering what they have gotten themselves into, we on the Cristina Calvert Weddings team have prepared a helpful crash course to guide you through some of the core elements of hosting.
But before you grab a pen and paper to fill out a list you’ve just titled, “The Perfect Guide to Impeccable Hosting,” please do hold your horses (and your martini glasses). Rather than advocating for extravagant whimsy or perfectly-measured spaces between plate and table edge, we thoroughly believe that a flawlessly executed party is simply one at which the hosts are enjoying themselves every bit as much as the guests. Fittingly, our personal mottos for hosting in the CCW office are twofold:
Play to your strengths and keep it cool, and
Having enough ice is more important than a fully-stocked bar.
In this spirit, we’ve written you all a two-in-one: First, we’ll outline “The Deal” for each topic, which tells you the tried-and-true tricks of hosting. But then comes “The Twist,” which acts like a note passed under the table that will streamline, simplify, and economize your party prep while still earning you a raised glass and a hearty round of applause from your impressed guests. Okay, now you can reach for that pen.
Stocking the Bar
The Deal
From the moment coats are shrugged off and couches are settled into, I’m on hand to whip up whatever my guests’ preferred cocktails might be. Whether they’ve trekked miles and crossed state lines to arrive at my front door or else just dashed over from down the street, a drink in hand provides a warm welcome and a natural way to ease into the evening’s festivities. Nowadays, my idea of a well-stocked bar includes all of the essentials you would think to keep on deck.
To assure you’re not caught off guard by an unexpected request, I’d recommend keeping the following liquors on deck:
Vodka
Gin
Rum
Tequila
Scotch
Whiskey
Bourbon
Rye
Vermouth (both sweet and dry)
Cognac or brandy
Triple sec
Non-alcoholic drinks and mixers are also a must. Stock up on:
Tonic
Club soda or sparkling water
Soft drinks
Orange and cranberry juices
Bitters
Lemons and limes
Now that your bar is perfectly prepped and your glasses are polished to gleaming, how do you know exactly how much of everything you’ll need for your upcoming soirée? A good rule of thumb I use is to estimate that I’ll be making one drink per guest, per hour. To be safe, increase that by 25 percent. For more fun math, keep in mind that a one-liter bottle of alcohol will typically yield around twenty drinks. And as regards mixers, assume that you will use one liter of tonic, club soda, or juice for every three guests.
Now to the all-important point about ice that we mentioned in the introduction — you’ll need about 1.5 pounds per person, which is inclusive of what you’ll need for ice buckets. Hosting a summertime garden party in your backyard? Double that. Because a perfectly-muddled mojito sounds like a delightful party drink — just not if it’s, you know, lukewarm.
The Twist
But, dear reader, keep in mind that I began hosting parties when I was just twenty-four. At that time, my idea of a fully-stocked bar was one that didn’t run out midway through the party. Since I couldn’t go to the liquor store and fully stock a bar before every event, I tapped into my knowledge of who was coming — if I knew that a majority of my guests would happily drink a vodka-based cocktail and wouldn’t think of touching a gin and tonic, I could reliably pick up some vodka and appropriate mixers and know I was good to go. Alternatively, pick up a couple of bottles of wine and a few liters of sparkling water or other non-alcoholic alternative if you’re not sure whether the crowd is cocktail-happy.
A fun trick I use that combines both style and function is to have a tray sitting on top of my bar area. Not only does it help to keep cocktail essentials organized when they are lying in wait on the bar for a party to bring them to life, it also makes for an easy transportation device to move prepared drinks to wherever my guests are settled.
If you’re working with a smaller bar setup, whether due to limited space or budget, consider an elegant tray to keep countertop instead of splurging on a tricked-out bar cart with hidden compartments for your coupe glasses: It’ll make for a lovely statement piece, and perfectly mixes function and form.
Setting the Table
The Deal
For a full rundown on the perfect table setting, Emily Post of course has us covered:
The Twist
But, unless you are planning to host the Queen of Sheba, a simpler setup will be fully sufficient. In short, your table setting for any dinner party should be guided first and foremost by the meal that you will be serving. For most standard dinner parties, you will likely be serving a first course, main course, and dessert — in which case, two forks and two knives (one set for the appetizer, and one for the main course) will do the trick. As for remembering where each utensil is placed, here’s a handy mnemonic device: “Spoon” and “knife” have five letters apiece, as does “right,” whereas “fork” has four letters, as does “left.” Match the utensils to their corresponding side, and your table’s nearly set. If the first course doesn’t require a knife, or if you’ll only be serving a main course, only one set is needed. And if you’re serving soup, add the soup spoon to the right of the knife.
If you’re serving up a wellspring of wine and champagne (or any other bubbly delight), feel free to add glasses for each separate drink. However, for the standard end-of-the-week dinner party where the end goal is unwinding instead of fine-wining-and-dining, just set out one glass for wine and one for water.
Fixing the Florals
The Deal
Should you choose to include them in your party decor, flowers are a beautiful and welcome way to add life and dimension to your event. Make sure to budget enough time for arranging your beautiful blooms — though the bouquet you grabbed from your local florist en route home looks lovely in store, it’ll need a bit of encouragement to reach its full potential on a tabletop. Aim to pick your chosen flowers a day or two before the big day, and then prep them by cleaning and cutting the stems, placing them in vitamin-infused water, and giving them a bit of time to settle in and get ready for the show.
The Twist
Don’t be afraid to use unconventional materials. We recently dreamed up a beautiful arrangement here in the CCW office that included leafy beet leaves stretching high over a creamy white vase. The red veins of the leaves added a welcome pop of color that perfectly complemented the pink peonies in the arrangement, and were a much easier and more economical find than other alternatives (now we’ve just got to figure out what to do with the beets themselves — beet and goat cheese salad, anyone?)
Do select and style your blooms so that they have a natural flow of movement and dimension. For example, mix and match longer and shorter stems, incorporate flowers in all stages of bloom (from just budding to almost past peak), and add foliage throughout. Incorporating a generous amount of foliage can also help stretch a floral budget, and will help your arrangement to look lush and natural.
Don’t go overboard on the centerpieces. Keep them low enough so that guests aren’t craning their necks to talk around them, and use any large, fun bowls you already have at home to avoid having to purchase extra vases. Add some crumpled chicken wire or a foam block at the base to arrange flowers that look as if they are cascading over the edge like a delicate waterfall.
Do place small arrangements in several locations around your home to keep the welcoming atmosphere pervading throughout. Good contenders include entryway tables, coffee tables, and guest powder rooms.
For the Guest
As many times as you’ll whip around putting finishing touches on hors d’oeuvres and figuring out the perfect lighting scheme for your own events, there will be infinite more times that you will show up as a guest at someone else’s fête. True to this fact, we’ll be closing out this installment of Dinner Diaries by giving you, the inimitable host, a few tips and tricks for when you find yourself on the other side of the party planning process.
This is a personalized compendium of what we on the CCW team personally swear by, but the best piece of advice we can impart is to simply go with your gut! You know your hosts better than we ever could, and we’re positive that you will show them appreciation for their efforts in a way that showcases your own personal touch.
Pre-Party
Ask your host(s) if there is anything they would like you to bring: A bottle of bubbly, a classic appetizer, or just your best self on their doorstep.
To the above, if you’ve signed up to cook a delicious dish, make sure that you are not making it for the first time! Just as a host’s worst nightmare is to find out that their intended main course offering of beef bourguignon is nearly impossible for them to perfect and plate on time, you’ll want to avoid promising fluffy bacon-cheese gougères and then having to show up with a store-bought hummus.
Be clear on the dress code: Whether you’re encouraged to dress to the nines or else to kick back and relax in comfort, make sure that you’re appropriately matching either heels or sneakers to your outfit.
Party Time
Do show up on time (unless you’re sure that your host is playing by Spanish time rules) and be mindful of timing throughout the evening: If your host’s day job requires an early wake-up call, for example, assume that ringing in the midnight hour during a weeknight party will likely not be appreciated.
Be aware of the help that your host wants (and the help they do not want): Some of us in the office love when guests chip in to help with dishes and cleanup throughout an event, whereas others of us loathe the thought. If in doubt, ask your host what they need and help other guests to follow suit if needed.
Post-Party
Keep your host in mind when preparing your thank-you gift: If the party-giver is a dear friend and not a first-time-visited neighbor, feel free to relax some of the rigid rules of gifting. Though a bouquet of flowers and a hand-written thank you card on personalized stationary is always a lovely touch, your best friend will be just as excited (maybe even more so) by a delivery of their favorite hangover food and a few bottles of electrolyte-laden sports drinks to thank them for a raucous and riveting evening.
And there you have it, that’s a wrap on your party planning crash course! Our advance apologies for adding to your event-time to-do list, but there is one last thing we need you to remember: Once the plates have been polished off and the last drops of wine have been drunk, just past the moment when your last guest waves goodbye and disappears into the night with a smile (and maybe a few leftovers tucked under their arm), you are required to raise one last glass — to yourself. You created a memorable night and brought people together to create new memories and share deep laughs, and that is the ultimate cause for celebration. We were so very happy to have helped it all come together, here’s to you.